Arielle Ford on Turning Your Mate Into Your Soulmate

Falling in love with someone is often the easiest part of a romantic relationship. Making the love last and creating a fulfilling marriage is often not as simple. Over time, reality can set in, we may take our partner for granted, push one another’s buttons and forget about the love that brought us together in the first place.

Known as the “Cupid of Consciousness” and “The Fairy Godmother of Love,” bestselling author Arielle Ford’s newest book, “Turn Your Mate into Your Soulmate: A Practical Guide to Happily Ever After,” is dedicated to helping couples rediscover and rekindle love, improve their romantic relationships and change their lives for the better.

And she also set out to bust the myth that once we find our soulmate — something she taught so many to find with her book “The Soulmate Secret” — that everything will be easy, with no problems or disagreements.

“Like a lot of people I bought into the fairytale myth of soulmates and happily ever after. If they are really your soulmate, they will know how to make you happy in every moment, and it will be really easy and effortless,” Ford tells Elevated Existence in the March 2016 issue cover story. “Then I manifested my soulmate, got married and found out it wasn’t true. I had no idea the person you thought was totally perfect when you were in the honeymoon phase, or the phase I like to call the ‘socially acceptable form of insanity,’ when you are literally crazy in love and your brain is flooded with all these good hormones like dopamine and oxytocin and adrenaline, wouldn’t last.”

Layout 1Ford believes this phase is nature’s way of tricking us into mating so we keep the species going. But often around the 16- to 18-month mark, those “feel-good hormones” disappear, and we are left with a “perfectly imperfect human being to live with, and we don’t know how to do it,” she says, explaining we then start questioning if the person we are with is truly our soulmate because it just shouldn’t be so hard.

“I wrote this book because I really wanted people to know what’s true about love, soulmates and relationships, and what is really normal,” Ford explains. “I spent 130 hours interviewing the world’s top love, relationship and marriage experts, and then took their best advice and road-tested it in my own relationship. That is what’s in the new book.”

Elevated Existence interviewed Ford for the March 2016 issue cover story to get some of her best advice, tools and research when it comes to relationships, including how to communicate, what men really want and much more!

Here are some of the highlights:

  • “So many people think love is just a feeling. If I’m feeling love then there is love, but it’s so much deeper than that. Love is a behavior, a commitment, a choice, a decision and an action,” Ford says. “So there will be days when you don’t like your soulmate very much, but it doesn’t mean you don’t love them. Just like you might have a favorite dog or a cat, and you might love your pet, but there are days when they misbehave and you don’t like the behavior. But it doesn’t mean you don’t love them. So when your partner is doing something you don’t like, you have to just ask yourself, is this a reason not to love them?”
  • “You start off with chemistry, but that is actually not the most important thing to predict a long-term relationship,” Ford says. “You want connection, compatibility, communication, and most important, a shared vision for the future.”
  • “[Men] they are wired to win,” says Ford. “If you can set up a man to win, if you could let him know every day that he is your hero, you could get almost anything out of him. They will do almost anything for you because they want to win.”

For the full article, you can purchase the digital or hard copy of the issue, or subscribe to Elevated Existence’s Membership here!

The Truth About Soulmate Love

By Tammy Mastroberte

We all dream of finding our perfect soulmate to love and cherish forever, and we often feel if we could just find that one person, then everything in our lives would fall into place. There would be no fighting, pain or disagreements, and life would just be an endless stream of bliss and love.

However, that is just not the reality or the purpose of love relationships. Yes, being with our soulmate can be wonderful, fun, exciting and blissful. But it can also cut us deep, bring up old wounds and push all our buttons. But that’s exactly the way it should be.

Back in June 2012, bestselling author Marianne Williamson taught a weekend workshop dedicated to the topic of romantic relationships, and she shared the true purpose of these connections from the viewpoint of “A Course in Miracles,” which is to heal.

“The Course says relationships are assignments made in order to increase the maximum soul growth of both people,” she explained in our June 2012 cover story. “It is as though a giant machine somewhere sees where you are wounded, and then picks out the person and situation in all of the universe in combination with whom you would most likely be healed.”

In the March 2016 issue cover story, bestselling author Arielle Ford shares expert advice and tips for reigniting love and passion in romantic relationships, and reconnecting to the feelings that brought us together with our partner in the first place. Her newest book, “Turn Your Mate Into Your Soulmate,” explains what is true and normal for relationships, and how with a little work, we can create our own happily ever after.

“Chances are if you marry somebody there was a time when you were in love and you believed they were your soulmate, and now you are thinking the grass is greener somewhere else or you are just not in love with them,” she says in the March 2016 issue. “There is a 90 percent chance what’s happened is you have years of anger, disappointment, frustration and unexpressed desires, or desires you expressed by yelling or shouting that didn’t get met. So all that love is covered up,” she shared. “But chances are the love is still there.”

I believe our soulmates are there to help us grow, evolve and heal, and I believe we planned it all with them before entering into this physical world. Remembering this, appreciating them and changing our perspective can not only transform our relationship, but can also strengthen our connection to our partner and the universe as a whole. Even if the relationship is not meant to last a lifetime, there is always a purpose, and there is always an opportunity to become a more evolved soul as a result.

But it’s up to us to increase our awareness and do the work. Soulmate love doesn’t equal easy, but it does equal expansion. And our souls and the souls of those we love are worth it.

Tammy_Mastroberte_headshotTammy Mastroberte is a three-time, award-winning writer, founder of Elevated Existence, and publisher and editorial director of the multi-award-winning Elevated Existence Magazine. She started the new age, spiritual and self-improvement publication at age 30 – eight years after the sudden death of her mother from a brain aneurysm only three days after Christmas in 1999. This tragedy led her down a synchronistic path to discover her purpose and the meaning behind many of the events in her life – including her mother’s death. She now shares her guidance, and the wisdom of today’s top authors and spiritual celebrities through Elevated Existence Magazine. Follow her on FacebookTwitter: @ElevatedTammy on Instagram: elevatedtammy. For more information, visit